My computer is acting so slow! I don’t know what’s wrong with it. My sister is in for the weekend from college, therefore she is the center of attention, like always. Oh well, maybe she and I can at least go shopping or something tomorrow, something so I can get out of this fucking house. I’ve got 8 more lbs to lose and I’ve got 13 days to do it. I know I can do it, I’ve just got to get off my ass and do some cardio. It should fall off fairly quickly because for the past week or so, my caloric intake has been less than 500..if that even. Today I had a cup of noodles (130), a salad with fat free red wine vinegrette dressing (15), and I Binged on 1 cup of baked potato soup (probably about 300) So, 445 today and I ate more today that I have in quite a while..especially withouth purging. Yesterday I ate a piece of pizza, but about 10 seconds after I ate it I ran to the bathroom at work and purged it. I haven’t tanned for the last 3 days either..grr..that’s the part that really pisses me off. I pay $45 for 30 days and I probably only ever go like 1/2 of the days and barely even get tan! It would certainly be better if I could drive. I know its only a little over 1/2 a mile from my house, but just getting the time and motivation to walk down there and back seems to be the hardest part for me. I wish I could find our tire pump. I could inflate the tires on my bike and ride that down there..that would certainly take less time.

I’ve had just an awful day today. I’m losing my feelings for Ricky. He and I both just need to move on. Neither of us are ever going to move closer together and if either of us did it would be me, but I already know that would be a huge mistake. We would end up being one of those couples that married young after they found out the girl was accidently pregnant. I would end up dropping out of college once again and working at some kind of shop n’ save for the rest of my life.. No way. That’s not the way its going to happen for me. As soon as I log off here, I am going to look at dentistry schools “somewhat” close to here. Hopefully somewhere southwest maybe?


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