So, after Monday’s super binge, I’ve done really well. Yesterday, I didn’t weigh myself because I knew it would be outrageous and I didn’t want to get depressed and say “fuck it. I’ve already screwed up might as well eat the whole damn house.” Because that’s exactly what I would have done. Yesterday, I didn’t eat anything all day and I had a 55 cal beer and 2 Jack & diets. I had to go to the dentist yesterday and when the numbing finally went away my jaw was really sore, I guess from keeping my mouth open for so long while getting the cavity filled. My coworker gave me a perk 5 and I just ate it. Well on an empty stomach that didn’t work out so well. I ran to the bathroom & puked it up.. Didn’t get much up obviously because I hadn’t eaten. I started to get really light headed so I munch on about 10-15 fries..not the healtiest I know, but it was my only option and I was seriously going to pass out cuz of that damn pill. Oh well, It didn’t affect me much because when I just weighed myself it said 134!..When I stepped on it the first couple times it said 133.8, but with as OCD as I am I have to weigh myself several times to make sure that it says the same number over & over & over again. And that turned up to be 134. That means I am 1LB under my halloween gw and only 3.8-4lbs from my 2gw. Today sucks! I don’t have to work, so I will be at home alllll night with nothing to do. I am going to want to eat like crazy just because I’m bored. I know it. I’m trying to get my mom to take me to the mall after she gets off work, so I can find some shoes to go with my halloween costumes. I also need a few accessories. That should keep my occupied for a little while. I’m also going to just binge myself with water allllll day. That used to work for me as far as keeping me full. Maybe I’ll try to catch a nap some time during the day maybe around 2:30 or so. That’ll be another hour I won’t have to worry about. I still have plenty of smart snacking options if I absolutely cannot stop myself from eating I just have to be sure and stick with those and not go munching on chips and sweets. I’ll just wait as long as I possibly can to eat today, because once I start eating I won’t stop.
EDIT: Also, last night after work, I was riding home with some of my coworkers and as hungry as I was everyone in the car was getting gross fattening things at hardees at 2am to shove their fat faces with then go to bed and let it turn to straight curdled fat in their arteries.. I didn’t have anything