Holding on to that dreaded 129 for weeks now it seems. I cannot complain too much. It’s the smallest I’ve been since highschool & that was nearly 6 years ago. But I am so close to my 2gw of 125! My dad’s 60th birthday party is next weekend. The 30th and we are having a huge party at our house. I would LOVE to be 125 by then because most of these people haven’t seen me since I was pregnant or before. I have no real reason to impress them or anything, but in a stuck-up sort of way I jsut long for those comments of “she looks so good!” & “There’s no way she’s had a baby” Once I reach 125 I’m going to work on my toning. I need to have some definition, but I want to be as lean as I can before I start that.

I bought another tanning package last week and I’ve only laid 3 times. SInce I’m working 2 jobs now, I have the money, but I hate seeing it go to waste, but I just really don’t have the time at all! I’d like to try to go after work this evening before I go to my other job, but I just don’t see me getting out of my 1st job early enough before I have to pick up the baby and get home to get ready for #2. Maybe I can make it around 8:30 or so after I’m off at the bar. I don’t really like tanning, but it boosts my confidence, really helps with this stubborn acne that I CANNOT get rid of!, and I think it makes me look skinnier too.

Stuff in the boy department is wierd. Jay & I have been “officially” together since January and we haven’t even had like a serious makeout session yet. I think he’s a little shy and well, I am too when I’m not wasted lol. I think I’m finally over drinking and partying. I just cannot handle the hangovers now that I’m older UGH! But I’m scared that he’s going to get bored with this little “relationship” if you really want to call it that. We had planned to go to a race next weekend in KY where we would spend a night in a hotel room, but now that my mom planned my dad a party, I really don’t want to be a bitch and miss it. I’m planning to take him on a white water rafting/camping trip for his birthday, but that’s not til august :/ I don’t need sex to be happy in a relationship, but I DO need my significant other to show SOME type of affection. I mean, he rarely ever even kisses me. I need to start getting myself back to sexy. I need to tan, workout, do my hair & make up, get some new clothes and make myself irresistable to him. I mean, I hate when a guy is insistent on being all over me ALL the time sometimes it gets annoying, but DAMN at least show me that you have some interest in me. :/ Maybe he doesn’t like me like he used to. Yep. Time to get my shit in gear and get HOT!

I’m kinda just picking up these posts from others

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